Leonardo Da Vinci Drives A Beat Up Lincoln Continental
A red light brought me to a stop when an old crazy looking grey beard honked behind me. I looked up to the rear view mirror and he was driving a decaying Lincoln Continental from the late 70’s. He reached around the floor and pulled up a white piece of paper which for a millisecond I mistook for a gun. The paper read:
“YOUR LEFT TAIL LIGHT IS OUT” and it was typed.
TYPED.
A bit stunned by the unexpected (my left tail light was indeed out), I waved a “thank you” and the light turned green and I speed off. This odd encounter invited some questioning.
1) What kind of man takes it upon himself to warn fellow drivers of potentially life-threatening maintenance issues with their cars on a daily basis? What kind of man prints out his warnings so that they are easily readable for his fellow drivers?
2) Because his action was premeditated, would it be too much to infer that he has multiple pieces of paper in his car, each with a different warning?
“YOUR RIGHT TAIL LIGHT IS OUT”
“YOUR FRONT, RIGHT TIRE SEEMS A LITTLE LOW ON AIR PRESSURE”
“DO YOU CHANGE YOUR OIL EVERY 3,000 MILES?”
3) If he does have multiple pieces of paper, how many pieces of paper does he have? How many contingencies did the man think about and is prepared for? Does he have other types of messages printed out?
“I KNOW I’M AN OLD MAN THAT DRIVES A RUSTED OUT LINCOLN CONTINENTAL, BUT PERHAPS WE COULD GRAB A DRINK? I’D LIKE TO FEEL YOUR FIRM, YOUTHFUL BREASTS GRAZE AGAINST MY PRICKLY OLD MAN BEARD. PLEASE, DON’T LAUGH!!! I’M OLD AND CAN’T GET IT UP AND I’M RUNNING OUT OF HOPE AND I DON’T HAVE VERY MUCH TIME LEFT ON THIS EARTH”
All of these questions were asked and answered mentally within a couple of seconds, but it wasn’t until I arrived home that a more interesting thought crossed my mind. Letters and hence writing appear backwards when reflected in a mirror and this old man had taken this fact of physics into account when typing up his signs. If I was reading this man’s typed message through my car’s rear view mirror, that means the man had typed his message backwards in order for me to be able to read it properly.
It is only after we process these points and put them in their context that it becomes all too clear how much thought and effort he put into these printed warnings. Is it cruel then that he will only be remembered in a blog post on a mildly successful tumblr?
I’M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE THIS OUT
(Source: keystomykingdom)
