I had such an amazing weekend. Thursday was supposed to be a normal night consisting of going to a friend’s party, but ended up being me talking to an odd looking kid who is very involved in the Southern California BDSM community. After hearing some fascinating shit, I asked if I could come and observe what goes on. “Of course you can! No one is ever required to do anything.” So if and when I actually get to this, I will certainly do a post about whips and leather and all the shit that goes down in the dungeons.
Then on Friday I went to an enormous function with lots of people and met this girl who I wanted to marry. She was witty and hilarious and was very open about sexual topics and she called me out on my bullshit and she likes “Patience” by Guns n’ Roses, which is one of my favorite songs of all time and she’s a huge Beatles dork and she’s beautiful with one of those French noses that turns up at the tip and she’s just fucking awesome and I want her. Unfortunately, she lives far away, but I hope our paths will cross again in the future. More importantly, I was reminded that yes, awesome girls do exist out there and that settling should never be an option.
Cool shit happened on Saturday that I can’t talk about and then on Sunday I went out to a local bar with a big group of family and friends. Having a drink with two friends from our group and THE HOTTEST GIRL IN THE BAR comes up to me and tells me I look like so & so from such & such movie (which I am starting to get more and more of, even though I think I look nothing like him). “I know you get this all the time, but…” “Yeah, I know what you’re gonna say, and…” Grabbed her wrist and it was thin and her skin was soft and smooth. Not exactly my type but she looked eerily similar to Carrie Prejean but had stronger features and reminded me of all the girls I wanted to fuck in high school but obviously never could. I then began to think about what kind of schemes I’d try to pull off if I was as hot as this girl. At the top of my list is trying to get free guacamole at Chipotle, followed by tooling lots and lots of men. After a while of that, this other girl comes up and tells my friend he looks like her friend and wants a picture and we talk for the next fifteen minutes. She looks like a mini Zooey Deschanel and was flirty and silly and a FUCKING DOCTOR, which made me love her because few men and fewer women can be smart and silly at the same time and remain confident like she was. Blah blah blah and this older girl I recognized from high school walked by and I’m like, fuck it, “Hey Wendy” and she turned around and she somehow remembered me and she was very drunk and batting her eyes sheepishly and suggestively and she was really sexy. Her boyfriend(?) who was closing their tab came by and whooshed her away and she waved bye. Ran into some more people and became engaged in witty banter and the whole night melted away. I am started to have more and more fun when going out and I think this is the start of something more. We’ll see.
This is me playing a little something on guitar. There was this old video of Pete Doherty playing some early song of his and the riff always stuck out in my head. I’m pretty sure I’m off because I’m not very good at guitar but the melody is one of my favorites. It’s one of those little things you play when the night is winding down. There’s a bit of background static in the recording so turn down the volume so it sounds better.
It was on a hot summer’s day in high school as I had just finished busting my load when the phone rang. That unique FUCK-what-should-I-do??? type of anxiety that accompanies being interrupted mid-jerk swept over me. The phone call was from a friend who was outside my house at that very moment with some guys and wanted to know if I cared to join them for a bbq at someone’s house. Not wanting to pass up free food, socializing, and a ride, I told him I’d be out in two seconds. I left the house, a fresh load still in the sink.
About six hours later I returned home to find ants had invaded my bathroom, marching single file from outside my house, through the window and to the food source: my dried up nut. Perhaps I’m a twisted fuck, but I was quite honored that this ant colony had chosen my semen for nourishment. Different scenarios started to play out in my head as I imagined thousands of ants taking the stale baby batter back to their nest, distributing it to the other ants and storing it for the cold winter that lay ahead.
But this was just the beginning! My semen had certainly reached the Queen Ant by now, which means royalty of some form has swallowed my load. The Queen had served my cum to foreign ambassadors and diplomats visiting her colony, telling them it was a rare delicacy not unlike caviar or truffles. They’d curiously nibble on it at first before proclaiming how divine it was and ask for second and third helpings. Queen Ant of course obliged, being a student of history and having studied the tactics of Catherine The Great, Elizabeth I, and Cleopatra, she knew that she was projecting the wealth and power of her colony by letting the emissaries gorge themselves on this rarest of treats. The ambassadors would go back to their respective queens and tell them of the great riches and luxury which they had witnessed in Queen Ant’s court.
I tried to repeat this experiment by leaving out a load the next couple of days (I told you, I’m a twisted fuck) and seeing if anything would happen. Perhaps there was food under that initial load or something I had eaten that day was of interest to the ants or maybe even it was a rogue faction of an ant colony which was desperate to survive outside of their home environment, but for whatever reason, the ants did not return to carry off my cum. It’s also a possibility that ants are dumb insignificant insects and didn’t know what the fuck they were eating, but perhaps that’s an oversimplification.
You could push me up against a wall have your way with me any old time. And if you're too tired then let me have mine with you. We could gently wake you up with a few wet kisses on your neck, along your chest and down to the tip of you...
mmmm just the thought of your rock hard cock dripping so sweet onto my tongue before your day even starts makes my pussy throb. I can only begin to fantasize how many times I could make you cum in a day... how many ways...
This honestly sounds like the perfect symbiotic relationship. When I want to do whatever I want with you, I can, and when I’m tired or lazy I get treated to a show that I have first row tickets to. Cum over.
when i read your posts i can't help but get so frustrated because i need a REAL cock inside me pumping me hard with reckless abandon and no regard for manners or gentleness
all i can do is imagine being fucked from both ends by you or anyone else
and when you cum you keep me there, unmoving, so i can feel your load inside me even if im uncomfortable
then you can get up and leave and ill still be in your bed, or on the floor
waiting for you anytime you feel the need to come back.
Your selflessness is a real fucking turn on. I’d come home from work and find you in my bed and fuck you and you’d ask, “Are you satisfied yet?” and I’d inform you that I wasn’t, so I’d drop another load inside of you and you’d ask again, “Are you satisfied yet?” and then I’d concede defeat. We’d go out after for fennel sausage pizza and caprese salad at our favorite place and half the load would still be inside of you.
Do you find pregnant women to be as attractive as the beautiful women you post on your blog? I'm currently pregnant, and that question sparked in my head
To begin with, if you’re young and reading this, please practice safe sex. Moving on…
When I was younger, I’d always hear much older men talk about how women are their sexiest when they’re pregnant and I couldn’t for the life of me understand why this idea was so pervasive. And then of course, I was actually around a pregnant woman one day in a supermarket and I had a huge epiphany. You see, pregnant women are hot for a couple reasons. Most importantly, some man nutted inside of her and MADE her pregnant with his seed. The idea that I can get a girl pregnant and add my part to bring another person into the world turns me on in a primordial kind of way.
I (obviously) don’t have children and won’t for quite a while, I’m sure, but the idea of knocking up my wife is REALLY FUCKING HOT. “I did that.” You know how guys like to take credit for things and mark thier territory? Well in a bizarre and twisted way this is the ultimate version of that. Or it might just be hot to me now and there’s different reasons when you’re actually fucking a pregnant woman, but that’s why I’m turned on by them in my current stage in life. I’ve heard pregnant pussy gets wetter than normal or like the pussy juice has a different consistency or something like that. My (married) family friend was being very vague in his analysis. Ask me again in ten to fifteen years and I’ll probably have different answers for you.
After reading your blog I've decided to explore my sexuality a lot more. I got a dildo and have had the most intense orgasms of my life doing so. Every time I cum I squirt so much I'll need to get a towel underneath me. I just wanted to say - thank you.
This is so fucking awesome. You’re welcome from the bottom of my heart.
"Someone middle aged, balding, obese, thick glasses, etc." And then you mentioned what our reaction would be when we saw the polar opposite. We already know you're 24. Now we know you have a head full of hair, you're somewhat fit, and if you have glasses.. they're not thick. My question is simple: if you've travelled, where have you gone? If you haven't, where would you like to go, and why?
Not what you expected, but life's usually better that way, eh? ;]
Your detective skills are quite admirable, even though you might be off on a thing or two. Or maybe you’re right on the money and I’m just saying you’re off to throw you off my trail. But you still might be on point.
But you might not be too.
Where have I traveled? I’ve been to Europe eight times and have traveled throughout the United States, though there are glaring holes, ex. New York, London, Paris. There are many places that I want to go to. I’d love to have a late ‘80’s Porsche and drive around New England during the changing of the leaves in the Fall with a girl sitting shotgun and us zip through forest roads to eat and observe and fuck. But we’d have to play the part too for all the small towners. She’d go into the general store to get some supplies and everyone would stare at her because she’s beautiful and the old man running the register would have a difficult time keeping eye contact with her and he’d stutter and she’d say, “Have a nice day,” and smile and the old man would remember her smile until he died. We’d then zip away in the Porsche, off to our next adventure and to leave a permanent image in another old man’s mind.
I've been following you for sometime now, enjoying your writing and ultimately your thoughts on things sexual and even those not. Through reading your posts, I've grown more comfortable with and aware of my sexuality, daring to push my own buttons and explore my body to the fullest, asking myself what exactly it is that turns me on so much. Or perhaps more accurately, do the things that once made sweet cum drip down my thighs just by the mere though of them, at work no less, still hold that power? Because lately, I've been finding that my preferences have been changing and I welcome the opportunity to "test the waters," if you will. As easy as it comes to me, no pun intended, it's no smooth sailing for my partner. I'm never truly satisfied which, as amazing as every other aspect of our relationship is, can be incredibly frustrating. Furthermore, I'm not sure what is more discouraging... that he thinks he is doing well and that I don't know how to tell him that is in fact not the case or that I always have to initiate everything, which ends up being quite unexciting for me anyway. I know what I like and what I want him to do to me, and though I realize he is not telepathic and I must voice my desires to glean any results, at times I get the feeling that he does not seem sexually attracted to me at all, making it all the more difficult for me to cum. And I so desperately want him to make me cum and make my body shake and convulse in ecstasy. Maybe it's because I want him to take control and he never does or that for once I want him to pin me down and bury his face between my lips and and move his warm mouth over me, slurping me up, catching the drops of cum pouring out of my pussy, trying to make their way down to my asshole, till his scruff is soaking wet with my nectar. I want to tell him what I want but exercise some tact in the process and am at a loss at how to do so. Any words of wisdom you'd like to impart on a certain sexually insatiable temptress?
If I interpret you correctly, you are for the most part happy with every aspect of your relationship except the sex part. I will repeat what I have said in the past.
Humans are made up of a million parts, sex being one of them. It is entirely plausible that you get along great and can connect on everything and like the same music and food and art but that you differ on your sexual outlook. You then have to ask yourself this difficult question: how important is the sexual part of the relationship for me?
Do NOT make the mistake of putting this off because if sex is very important to you and you’re not getting what you want, you will start to resent him more and more and this resentment will appear in other areas of the relationship. I think a common sense approach is to have a set length of of time where you try to “train” him to adopt your outlook and if he doesn’t pass the exam at the end of the semester, he fails and you move on. Yes, not being sexually compatible is a very legitimate reason to break something off.
I think something that every women should realize is that the modern male has been brought up in a society where it is inappropriate to look at women in a suggestive manner, to say crude things, to admit that yes, he wants to fuck as much as possible, etc. These things are great and necessary for the women in your professional and publc life that you are obviously not trying to have sex with. But unfortunately, treating women with what is broadly labeled as “respect” in public sometimes gets translated to the bedroom in many men’s eyes. In other words, he might find it disrespectful to initiate sex because he was taught, rightly so, that women alone consent to sex. He might think that smacking your ass or fish hooking your mouth is not “appropriate.” The list is infinite, but the golden solution is to let him know that such behavior by him is not only tolerable but desired. Tell him in conversations and when he’s fucking you, verbally tell him that you like it when does x, y, z. Show him that you can’t break the pussy and that there is nothing that he could dish out that you can’t handle and hopefully he will start to get the picture.
But, if he is a man where his nature is to be a soft lay, rather than being a sexual beast that has been conditioned by society to always let you initiate sex and for him to do boring shit in bed, then RUN FOR THE HILLS! You can’t change who people are and no amount of “training” will turn an innate bore into the passionate lover that you crave.